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CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco
rolled in paper
with fire at one end
and a fool at the other!
A pinch of tobacco
rolled in paper
with fire at one end
and a fool at the other!
MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement
wherein
a man loses his bachelor degree
and a woman gains her master
It's an agreement
wherein
a man loses his bachelor degree
and a woman gains her master
DIVORCE:
Future Tense
of Marriage
Future Tense
of Marriage
LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information
from the notes of the lecturer
to the notes of students
without passing through the minds
of either
An art of transmitting Information
from the notes of the lecturer
to the notes of students
without passing through the minds
of either
CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man
multiplied by the
number present
The confusion of one man
multiplied by the
number present
COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing
a cake in such a way that
everybody believes
he got the biggest piece
The art of dividing
a cake in such a way that
everybody believes
he got the biggest piece
TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which
masculine will power is
defeated by feminine water-power!
The hydraulic force by which
masculine will power is
defeated by feminine water-power!
DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes
before marriage
A place where divorce comes
before marriage
CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on
A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on
ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel
you are going to feel
a feeling
you have never felt before
A feeling when you feel
you are going to feel
a feeling
you have never felt before
CLASSIC:
A book
which people praise,
but never read
A book
which people praise,
but never read
OFFICE:
A place
where you can relax
after your strenuous
home life
A place
where you can relax
after your strenuous
home life
ETC:
A sign
to make others believe
that you know
more than
you actually do
A sign
to make others believe
that you know
more than
you actually do
COMMITTEE:
Individuals
who can do
nothing individually
and sit to decide
that nothing can be done
together
Individuals
who can do
nothing individually
and sit to decide
that nothing can be done
together
EXPERIENCE:
The name
men give
to their
Mistakes
The name
men give
to their
Mistakes
ATOM BOMB:
An invention
to bring an end
to all
inventions
An invention
to bring an end
to all
inventions
PHILOSOPHER:
A fool
who torments himself
during life,
to be spoken of
when dead
A fool
who torments himself
during life,
to be spoken of
when dead
DIPLOMAT:
A person
who tells you
to go to hell
in such a way
that you actually look forward
to the trip
A person
who tells you
to go to hell
in such a way
that you actually look forward
to the trip
OPPORTUNIST:
A person
who starts taking bath
if he
accidentally falls
into a river
A person
who starts taking bath
if he
accidentally falls
into a river
OPTIMIST:
A person
who while falling
from EIFFEL TOWER
says in midway
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"
A person
who while falling
from EIFFEL TOWER
says in midway
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"
PESSIMIST:
A person
who says that
O is the last letter
in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter
in OPPORTUNITY
A person
who says that
O is the last letter
in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter
in OPPORTUNITY
MISER:
A person
who lives poor
so that
he can die RICH!
A person
who lives poor
so that
he can die RICH!
FATHER:
A banker
provided by
nature
A banker
provided by
nature
CRIMINAL:
A guy
no different
from the other,
unless he gets caught
A guy
no different
from the other,
unless he gets caught
BOSS:
Someone
who is early
when you are late
and late
when you are early
Someone
who is early
when you are late
and late
when you are early
POLITICIAN:
One who
shakes your hand
before elections
and your Confidence
Later
One who
shakes your hand
before elections
and your Confidence
Later
DOCTOR:
A person
who kills
your ills
by pills,
and kills you
A person
who kills
your ills
by pills,
and kills you
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